• Jokes 13/7

    From GM3YEW@CAPCITY to HUMOUR on Sat Jul 13 03:20:00 2019
    R:190713/0609Z 5462@GB7YEW.#79.GBR.EURO LinBPQ6.0.18

    As Grandmother used to say

    Onion skins very thin, mild winter coming in

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    Do something unusual today. Pay a bill.

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    If two men agree on everything, you may be sure that one of them is doing
    the thinking.
    -- Lyndon Baines Johnson

    ---

    It's not reality or how you perceive things that's important -- it's what you're taking for it...

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    A husband was in big trouble
    when he forgot his wedding
    anniversary.

    His wife told him... "Tomorrow
    there better be something in
    the driveway for me that goes
    zero to 200 in 2 seconds flat".

    The next morning the wife found
    a small package in the driveway.
    She opened it and found a brand
    new bathroom scale.

    Funeral arrangements for the
    husband have been set for Saturday.

    ------

    A man dials his home and a strange woman answers.

    The man says, "Who is this?"

    "This is the maid," answers the woman.

    "We don't have a maid," says the man.

    The woman says, "I was hired this morning
    by the lady of the house."

    The man says, "Well, this is her husband.
    Is she there?"

    The woman replies, "She is upstairs in
    the bedroom with someone who I figured
    was her husband."

    The man is fuming and says to the maid,
    "Listen, would you l
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